Warning: Spoilers ahead for It Ends With Us book and movie adaptation.
Unfortunately, I have read Colleen Hoover.
I know, I know! She’s not a good person, her writing is awful, blah blah blah. I’m sure you might’ve seen some of the discourse surrounding her in the past, both her personal and professional life, and even more now that one of her works has gotten a movie adaptation. But before you crucify me, I’ve only ever read one book by her! It was a few years ago, and It Ends With Us was recommended to me by a friend.
Now, this is a hill I will die on: It was a good book.
Sure, the main character owns a flower shop, and is painfully named Lily Blossom Bloom.
Sure, Lily spent an uncomfortably large portion of the book writing letters to talk show host Ellen.
Sure, I might be disappointed in myself for liking it.
But it was good.
The story focuses on Lily and her relationship with Ryle, a man who on the surface seems perfect. Handsome, charming, and a neurosurgeon to boot. Together, they have the perfect life. Wonderful jobs, wonderful friends, and eventually, a wonderful marriage.
But despite what it sounds like, the book is not a rom-com. It’s not a “fun beach read”. It’s a story about domestic abuse. Lily grew up in an abusive environment and saw her mother victimized at the hands of her father.
The story takes place over a period of a few years, her relationship with Ryle from beginning to end, with several “flashback” scenes to her time in high school. She meets a homeless student named Atlas, who eventually becomes her boyfriend. Her father physically assaults him when he discovers them together. Atlas is taken to the hospital, she’s forbidden from seeing him, and he joins the army. Several years later, Lily is living in Boston. Her father dies, and she meets Ryle. Despite Lily initially being reluctant, Ryle pursues her. They start dating, and everything seems perfect.
As time goes on, “accidents” keep happening. Things Lily tries to brush off. The accidents are too blurry to really make sense of what happened, too few and far between. Eventually, Atlas comes back into her life, which makes Ryle jealous. This, in turn, makes his behavior worse. There’s even one notable incident where he pushes her down a flight of stairs. He insists that she fell.
When Lily becomes pregnant, she leaves Ryle with the help and encouragement of Atlas. She gives birth to her daughter and tells her the cycle will end with them. The story finishes with Lily and Ryle co-parenting and a hopeful future for Lily and Atlas’s relationship.
The part that makes me most frustrated when people talk about the book online is that so many people seem to think it’s a romance. It’s all about how great Atlas is, how cute they are together, and it makes me furious. It Ends With Us isn’t about Lily being rescued by her knight in shining armor, and living happily ever after.
Atlas isn’t one of the main characters. It’s not about him, it’s not about falling in love. They literally end the book as friends. With a slight possibility of something more.
It Ends With Us is about how domestic abuse is a cycle. One that feels almost impossible to break. It’s about choosing to leave, even when that feels harder than staying. Lily witnessed her own mother’s abuse, and it skewed her perception of what a normal and healthy relationship looks like. It made her more vulnerable for the exact same thing to happen to her.
Domestic violence isn’t black and white. It’s complicated, confusing, and terrifying. Victims of abuse aren’t being hurt by a stranger – they’re being hurt by someone they once loved, and possibly still do. The book does an excellent job of conveying those feelings. Even as a reader, you can feel yourself minimizing Ryle’s behavior. Because you understand Lily’s mindset. There’s always an easy explanation, a way to believe him when he says it’s an accident. A way to believe him when he says it’s the last time. Ryle keeps promising to be better, and you want to believe him.
It’s a good book. Which is why it’s such a shame the movie adaptation is being handled the way it is.
Don’t get me wrong, I liked the movie. It wasn’t spectacular by any means, but it told the story. Sure, some of the dialogue might’ve left something to be desired. But the source material is from renowned millennial Colleen Hoover. It was unavoidable.
The quality of the acting was a range. The supporting cast was pretty average, nothing too great, nothing too bad. Blake Lively, who starred as Lily, has gotten some online flak for her performance. I’d have to disagree with that. I mean, she didn’t exactly have a lot to work with. Lily is a very guarded character, and unfortunately not one with much depth. Again, and I cannot reiterate this enough, It Ends With Us was not amazingly well written. It was in fact, exceedingly mediocre. The actual story is what gives the book its laurels. So yes, parts of Lively’s acting felt slightly vapid. But she showed up when it mattered. For emotional scenes, she delivered.
The real surprise for me was Justin Baldoni, who portrayed Ryle along with directing the film. I’ve never seen any of his work, but I think I need to after watching this movie. His performance was spectacular. He had a difficult job, playing a man who was both charming and manipulative, sympathetic and terrifying. But he absolutely nailed it. He made you care about Ryle. Even knowing how the story ended, I could feel myself wanting Lily and Ryle to work. I wanted Ryle to be good.
Really, the only truly bad thing about the movie was the costume design. It was hideous. Lily was dressed like she had stepped directly out of an off-brand version of Teen Vogue from 2013. With an emphasis on “quirky” and “not like other girls”. The amount of denim, plaid, and sequined costumes made me want to cry. No color coordination whatsoever. Was the costume designer doing a “how-to” on dressing for the circus?
Atlas’s bomber jacket just made him look dumb. There’s literally no other way to describe it. Ryle’s clothes didn’t know the meaning of “color” or “design”. Every single shirt was a varying shade of plain dark blue. When Lily and Ryle got married, I audibly gasped. Thank god the camera cut off at the shoulders, because I honestly don’t think I would’ve been able to handle a full length view of that tulle and pearl monstrosity that Lily called a wedding dress. There was absolutely nothing redeemable about one piece of clothing in the entire film.
Surprisingly though, it’s not the clothes that have come under fire following the movie’s release. It’s not even anything in the film. It’s the way it’s being promoted.
The main controversy surrounds Lively. She appears to essentially have been treating this like her own personal fashion show. Prior to this, I’ve never felt any particular way about her. She’s pretty, she’s decently talented. But the way she’s been handling the movie has colored the way I see her. For every event on the press tour, she showed up in different floral-themed clothes. Her social media became flower-themed.
When promoting the movie on Instagram, she encouraged viewers to “wear florals”. To a movie about domestic violence. Yeah. Internet users compared it to the trend of “wearing pink to go see Barbie”. If I hadn’t read the book, I would’ve thought it was some hallmark-esque comedy, about a brave girl starting her flower business in the big city.
Maybe she has spoken up about the issues at the focal point of the movie. But her sporadic attempts feel half-hearted. It’s hard to believe that she’s being genuine when she’s also using the movie’s press tour to promote her haircare and beverage brands.
Of course, once the digital mob smelled blood, they went all in. Lively’s past was dissected under a microscope. She’s currently in hot water for using slurs, rudeness in interviews, feuding with past co-stars, etc. But we’re not going to even attempt to open that can of worms.
Looking at the current dumpster fire that sprung from Lively’s promotion of It Ends With Us, you turn around and see Baldoni. Since day one, he has been an advocate and a voice for the complicated topics that this movie covers. He has maintained since the very beginning that they were “very intentional in the making of this movie”. Most, if not all of his interviews focus on the topics of domestic violence. He’s shared multiple resources on his social media platforms. Point is, he gets it. He understands the movie that they made. But of course, it was all overshadowed by the behavior of A-List diva Blake Lively.
This movie could’ve been really special. It was seen by hundreds of thousands, grossing over 180 million worldwide. The movie’s audience has only grown since it hit streaming services Sept. 24. The point is, the production team had a chance here. A chance to bring awareness to a serious topic on the global stage. But instead, any good that the movie’s message could bring was pushed aside in favor of controversy and drama.
The movie hired a PR crisis manager to help tackle the negative press, but they shouldn’t have needed one in the first place. Knowing the source material, cast and crew should have approached the movie seriously. With an understanding that 25% of all US women, their target audience, have reported experiencing domestic violence in their lifetime. The film industry should take this as a cautionary tale. When you undertake a project with heavy topics, learn about them. Advocate for victims, instead of profiting off of them. This was nothing less than unacceptable.
Domestic violence hotline: 800-799-7233
